Failures And Mistakes Make You A Wiser Person
Failure. It’s the word that haunts many of us. It is the word that paralyzes some. It is the word that keeps many of us from stepping out and accomplishing what we desire to achieve. We ask ourselves internal questions. What if things don’t turn out right? What if I embarrass myself? What if I embarrass those close to me? What if they talk about me? What if my failure becomes a stain on my life for the rest of my life? When we do fail at something, many of us beat ourselves up internally and even physically. I can’t believe that happened! I blew it! I messed up! I’m a failure! Failure has the potential of ruining your destiny and crippling your dreams. However, is failure really as bad as we make it out in our minds to be?
Did you realize that you came into this world ignorant and not knowing anything? You were not born into the world with an imaginary handbook encoded into your brain on the do’s and don’ts of life. You did not come into the world knowing it all. Growing up, you gradually start to learn from certain incidents and how you can force a different outcome should it arise again. Some of you remember being burned by the hot stove when you touched it for the first time. Did you know the consequence that would come from doing that? No. It had not burned you yet.
No matter how cautious you are in life, you will stumble at times. What you need to understand is your failure is not the end of the world nor is it the end of your life. The failure is an opportunity to begin again only this time with better understanding. I remember times when I failed so horribly that I wanted to check out of here right there. I thought I could go no further. I cried myself to sleep. Then, the next day came and the day after that. I made steps to improve and got better. As I got better, I felt better. When you have a winner mentality, your failure will motivate you to be better.
What Went Wrong?
When you make a mistake, take time and analyze what happened. What led you to make this mistake? What were the things that happened right up to when you made the mistake? What factors played a role in your failure or mistake? What can you do to ensure that it doesn’t happen again? These are the types of questions you need to answer. Doing this will help you pinpoint the way in which you messed up so you can correct it accordingly.
Once you have done this, it is time to move on. It is very easy to dwell on what you did not do right in life depending on how severe your mistake or failure was. Yesterday is over. It’s a new day. You cannot change what happened yesterday nor can you go back in time to fix it. Yesterday and all the things that happened before yesterday are out of your control. However, you are in control of your future decisions and what happens from this very moment on.
So you missed critical free-throws in a game and the team lost. You cannot change the lost game. You can change the outcome of the next game however by diligently practicing your free throws when necessary. You failed a driving test. You cannot change the failed test. However, you can change the outcome of the next driving test by practicing more and honing your skills. So you hurt someone that you care about. How can you make amends? What can you do to avoid this in the future?
Adapting
Okay. So you have figured out what you did wrong. You’ve analyzed what led to that point. Now it is time to adapt. The word adapt to me basically means to change/adjust what you are doing in such a way that you can succeed. I don’t know about you, but I have learned a lot from the final fight between Bruce Lee and Chuck Norris in The Way of the Dragon(1972). If you haven’t seen it before, I suggest you check it out on YouTube. It’s an awesome fight to me that has a hidden message under the layer that I believe Bruce Lee wanted to convey to people. That message is adapting to win. Bruce Lee was losing until he realized that he needed to change his style and approach to Chuck’s in order to get the victory.
That is just like life! If you want a different result, you have to do something different. What can I do differently from what I did before that will help me to get this thing right the next time around? Do I need to study harder? Do I need to change the way I do this? Do I need to let this go? Do I need to let them go? Do I need to change my perception and thinking? What is it that I need to do to overcome and succeed the next time? I am sure you can tell by now that I am asking many questions. It is because it is these types of questions that you and I need to answer if we are going to ultimately bounce back stronger then we’ve ever been. Improvise, adapt, and you will overcome!
Your Future Self
How do you see yourself in the future? How do you picture your future? Do you see yourself as a better person? Do you see yourself as greater than you were before? What I am telling you is to never stop dreaming. Keep a vision in your mind! If you can envision yourself succeeding where you failed, then you can. Write the things you want to improve on and be better at in a notebook or on a piece of paper. Post it on your wall somewhere. Repeat it daily to the point where it is engrained in your mind. See yourself succeeding, at peace, passing the test the next time, overcoming your struggles, winning, etc. Then, take the necessary steps to bring this new resilient and powerful you into existence.
So when you look back on your life, thank your failures because they made you wiser. And now that you have wisdom, you can reach others coming up behind you and try to do something to keep them from making the same mistakes you did. Instead of letting it cripple you, use your failure as fuel and motivation to triumph!
